Home Menu!! Calendar!! Catering Menu Directions, Etc.

Don't miss "Play It Forward" Benefit.....featuring the Goshorn Brothers, Blue Run with Gary Burbank and Nathan Whitt....and maybe more........ Saturday August 2nd, 2008

Space is limited!! Call to make a reservation today!!

513-771-1440

Bar-B-Q Missionary Invades New Territory

"The Story of Burbank's Real Bar-B-Q Restaurant" by Gary Burbank

In the south, barbeque is a way of life. I was raised on barbeque. Mama nursed me on a sauce called "Bottle Inferno" and I cut my first tooth on a rib bone. When I visited to the north, I was shocked to find no real barbeque joints. Sure there were rib restaurants, but they served counterfeit barbeque. It just wasn't real. I felt pity. Somehow these poor Yankees had been deprived of this necessary nourishment. They were missing something in their diets. You could see it in their hollow eyes, their blank faces. And then I was hit with an epiphany...Yankees needed real barbeque!!
I came to the conclusion that real barbeque could bring our nation together. (If only I had been born a hundred and fifty years earlier, we could have avoided the Civil War.) Offering barbeque to the masses could eliminate crime, reduce the national trade deficit and bring world peace. Earl Pitts was right..."If only Saddam Hussein had eaten barbeque..." It was at this moment that I realized my purpose in life. I had to become a missionary of sorts. I had to bring real barbeque to the North. Mama admonished me, "Gary, Yankees ain't supposed to have real barbeque." For the first time in my life, I disregarded Mama and with reckless abandon, I packed up my tongs, hitched up the smoker and set out for the promised land.

I set out on an odyssey in the South to find the perfect barbeque. Barbeque which melded the perfect ingredients, the right combination of taste, texture and consistency. I stopped at every barbeque joint I passed, eating southern barbeque for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Heck, sometimes, if the place looked right, I even stopped for a snack. I gained knowledge. I gained insight. I gained...a lot of weight!! And then I found it...the perfect barbeque. Now it was time to appreciate real barbeque. I joined up with my local group of loyal followers, called the rib-postles, and began preaching the delicious word. But after three days, the multitudes became hungry.

All I had was a sack of three rib bones from the Smokey Ridge Barbeque in Memphis, and a half can of flat beer. But as I kept reaching in the bag, it kept producing ribs...and out of the can flowed delicious barbeque sauce. We fed the whole crowd. It was truly a barbeque miracle. Mama was wrong (good thing she can't read, or I'd be in trouble writin' that). Yankees would love real barbeque.

Now all we needed were sauces that would appeal to all regions and all tastes. After more research, we settled on four sauces. The first, Yankee Sweet is a thick sweet sauce, similar to what the serve in Kansas City. The second was the Southern Tang Mild, a mustard vinegar based sauce with a little kick. The third was the Southern Tang Hot, with a lot of kick. And the last was the 911 Screamer, so hot you'll scream! We keep these sauces under lock and key in our sauce cellar. That's how much we value our research and discoveries.

Then I realized that something was missing from our venture. I played a Howlin' Blind Muddy Slim tape as we ate. The missing ingredient was found - The Blues.

So here we are at the Yankee-Southern real barbeque joint enjoying the fruits of our labors. Yankee converts to real barbeque have come in droves to partake of the mystic communion of fire, smoke, and meat in the total absense of water. Which just goes to show ya, give a Yankee a rack of ribs and he'll eat for a day, open a restaurant that serves quality food, with quality service, in a great atmosphere and you can feed him forever.

Thanks for eatin' with us.

--Gary